Reflections on the Boys to Men Conference

MenandBoysThis mini-conference was hosted by Agence Ometz, Shaare Zion Congregation and Centre de santé et service Sociaux Cavendish on October 6, 2009. The focus was on the lives of boys and men and the concerns about violence. Jackson Katz was the highlight of the conference speaking in terms all of us could understand. Other speakers (Gilles Tremblay and Hal Hannaford) contributed valuable ideas as well.

Here are a few interesting points which were made during the conference. They are not in any particular order and each one deserves more investigation.
• Most conferences on male violence are attended by an overwhelming majority of women
• Exposure to violent images in video games, on TV and in movies effectively desensitizes and normalizes violence
• Commercial interests reinforce stereotypes –
o Girls’ toys are frequently princesses and pink, while boys’ toys are often military and sports figures;
o Boys and girls both play with “dolls’” but the term “dolls” is reserved for girls while boys play with “action figures”
Bowling for Columbine – Michael Moore missed a golden opportunity for a teachable moment. He did not articulate that men are the ones using guns – 95% of gun violence is by men, yet Moore talked of gun violence with no reference to gender
• Thinking of the nature versus nurture argument, it was suggested that maybe men are naturally more violent than women. To counter that argument, note that the US is a more violent country than Canada suggesting that violence is more cultural than genetic
• Interesting books to consider reading: Pink Brain, Blue Brain: How Small Differences Grow Into Troublesome Gaps — and What We Can Do About It by Lise Eliot; Female Chauvinist Pigs by Ariel Levy; Packaging Boyhood by Brown, Lamb and Tappan; and Packaging Girlhood by Lamb and Brown; Coaching Boys into Men Playbook available from the Family Violence Prevention Fund

—John Gordon, LCC School Counsellor