I don’t know if you are aware, but at our daily lunches in the Junior School there is a significant new focus on etiquette and bringing manners back to the table. In fact, we’re so serious about this initiative, that we have sent letters to Junior School parents explaining our dining focus. Essentially, on a weekly basis, a basic element of mealtime manners will be discussed and reinforced. What a great idea!

Manners, civility and what constitutes good behaviour at the dinner table are valuable tools for all students, regardless of age. In addition to the importance of good manners, did you know that family meals are actually critical for the healthy development of all children?

With easy access to fast food, the explosion of school and community activities, and very busy parents, we are now a more fractured society than 20 years ago. In most Canadian families, both parents work, and for obvious reasons, the quick fix at suppertime makes practical sense.

However, despite the challenges of busy evening schedules, research has shown that one of the best practices for any family is to find ways to eat together on a regular basis. In fact, regular family dining is actually one of the best indicators of family unity and the development of strong parent-child bonds. In terms of teenage development, the regular family meal is one of the best routines that to be enforced in any household. Why is it so important? Mealtime is when family members share, compromise, “confess,” and learn to listen. Family legends are passed down, jokes are told, and the wider world is examined through the lens of each family’s core values. In essence, the mealtime reinforces that citizenship in a family includes certain standards and expectations beyond individual whims of children.

The most extensive and probing study on family eating patterns was published a few years ago at Columbia University in New York and was reinforced with new data this week. In both studies the results were significant. Researchers found that the more families eat together, the more the investment of time together pays dividends. In fact, with regular family meals, teenagers are less likely to smoke, drink, experiment with drugs, suffer from depression or develop eating disorders. Students who eat regularly at family dinners also do better in school, are less stressed, have better vocabularies, eat a more balanced diet, and yes, they have good table manners. In short, there are some pretty significant advantages…. all from simply breaking bread together as a family!

Note that in a world where too often we seek complex solutions to problems, the family dinner is sort of like a magic blanket. So the next time your family sits together for a meal, lose the TV and cell phones, pull up a chair, take off the ball caps, sit up straight and engage in something called conversation. It’s amazing what everyone might share and learn. Let the magic of family dining do its work!
—Chris Shannon, Headmaster